Changes

Well, I've been reflecting a lot this week. I really can't believe how much my life has changed in just under 9 months!

I just accepted a job as a gate agent for Delta Airlines. I've worked in reservation sales for 2 years. It's ok to be fat in reservations! No one sees you. As a gate agent not only do I have to lug big suitcases all day, I have a uniform to wear. I've never had a job that required a uniform. NEVER. Simply because I have been the fattest person I know for a very long time! It's kinda like the bridesmaid thing where all the girls are skinny and then there's 1 fat one. You think "One of these things is not like the others" (of course singing in your head) No? Ok, maybe I'm the only one that's had that experience.

I am still a little nervous about wearing the little dress or the pant and tucked in shirt, but it will be ok.

Anyways, I had to pass a physical endurance test to get the job and I'm proud to say that I passed.

My dad worked as a ticket agent for the old Frontier airlines. I remember going to see him when I was just a little girl. He would have me come back behind the counter and I would staple the crap out of the ticket jackets. I thought he had the coolest job, and I've always secretly wanted to do that. It's a job that fat people can't do. That's just how it is. I couldn't have passed the physical test before. Also the uniforms only go up to s size 24, and though I'm much smaller than that now, I was much,much bigger than that before.

In the last 9 months, I have lost 150 pounds, but I've also gone from a BMI of 61 to a 32. Yup, 32 is still obese, but dude, I'm so close to being in the "overweight" range. If you think it's tragic that I'm so excited to just be overweight, consider this. At the end of my 6th grade year, I weighed 218 pounds. Yes, I was 12 years old. I weigh less today than what I weighed at 12 years old. I've lost almost half of my original body weight.

I can ride my bike for miles and miles and miles. I used to struggle to walk up 5 stairs.

There are also changes in the love life department. I won't say much here, but I am dating someone who is the most amazing kindest man I have ever met!

My therapist got teary as I told him about it and said that it made him feel good inside to think that his therapy has worked and I've finally broken the cycle of choosing abusive men that were unwilling or unable to take care of me.

I like to think that I'm one step closer to having a whole, healed me.

I start my new job on monday, and it feels like a brand new life is ahead of me.